Tarot for self care and self exploration. A place to learn, develop and explore tarot.
Author: Heather
Heather is a lost member of a travelling circus (also known in the common vernacular as an English Teacher) who somehow found herself in writing online. She is originally from Canada and enjoys eating out and cooking creative meals for herself (though she prefers the former and often burns the latter). Some of her favorite dishes include Sapi Rendang, Chiburek, and deep-fried ice cream. She makes a mean pumpkin loaf.
Day 15: What can I do today to connect with my inner childlike wonder and curiosity?
Card: Ten of Swords
I should sit with the pain of the past and the present before I try to move past it. I’ve been working on the whole ‘feel your feelings’ thing- I know it sounds silly but I’m one of those people who kind of logics their feelings into submission, but it doesn’t actually help me get past the feelings. I just psychoanalyze them and still feel shitty. Maybe this is a call to stop doing that, and sit with the pain.
Deck used: I’m pretty sure this is a bootlegged version of the Spacious Tarot. It was given to me by a friend who thought it would be a nifty gift, and it is- I like it a lot, but it’s got a real aliexpress-ness about it. The biggest issue with these kinds of decks is that the creator makes no money from them. If it’s an indie creator who you want to see profit from their work, you should do what you can to purchase from them authentically. That being said, your classic RWS, old-fashioned tarot decks are (I’m pretty sure but don’t quote me) within the public realm now- or they should be. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with finding affordable tarot options 🙂 Some decks will run you 150 bucks plus shipping, and if you want to use tarot as a self reflection tool, you shouldn’t be limited to only super pricey decks.
Today has been a day full of studying and writing about Play Therapy! Something very interesting, and statistically significant in terms of the results it provides. I’m hoping to get into it in the future, though how I’ll make that happen, I’m unsure. There don’t seem to be many registered play therapists in my area who would be able to supervise me, which is problematic, to say the least. But I’m getting ahead of myself, like I usually do!
Day 14: What can help me find myself, or what can help me find what I am looking for?
Card: 8 of swords. I need to work on the way I think about myself and my life- try to break out of my current line of thinking. Stay hopeful, and understand that I can untie the things that have me bound. I need to stop putting limits on what I think I’m capable of. DANG OK.
🙂
As you may have been able to tell, I’ve been using This Might Hurt a lot lately. It lives next to my computer at the moment, which is where I’m spending most of my time. Love this deck.
Tell me something in the comments. Anything. I don’t mind 🙂
I’ve spent the whole day writing an essay that I feel is way too broad and doesn’t make any sense so I’m juuuuust about typed out but here we go!
Day 13: Where can I use a sense of playfulness and curiosity in my approach to life?
Card: 10 of Swords.
I need to be more vulnerable- I need to take on curiosity into painful endings, betrayal, loss and pain generally. I need to take the pain of the past with a lighter heart and a sense that I’ve moved passed it- I’m in a different place, I’ve grown, I’ve developed. I can explore them and look into why they came about and what I can learn about them- or I can let them move along and leave me be.
It was my birthday on Friday, and now that I feel as if I’ve done enough research for my next paper that’s due, I thought it might be fun to try a birthday spread. I’m going to be using this one from Biddy Tarot (an awesome online resource). There are a lot of birthday spreads out there- I figured this one would be a nice little challenge.
And here’s my spread:
Top row: Eight of Cups, Knight of Wands, The Tower Rx, Nine of Swords Rx, The Hanged Man RX
Middle row: The Wheel of Fortune Rx, The Chariot Rx, The Star, Two of Cups
Bottom row: Three of Cups, Six of Wands, Seven of Cups
The previous year in summary: Walking away from things that didn’t seem to fit me, trying to find my own path in life. I feel like if we take this from the last birthday, it fits really well, as I’ve been trying to make my scholastic dreams happen quite a bit this year, I quit smoking, I changed my eating habits, and I’ve left a lot of things behind.
What have I learned from the past year: I’ve learned how to take charge, go for it, and just apply and see what happens! Make big changes, make big leaps. Sometimes I’ve been too headstrong and I’ve screwed stuff up, too. I’ve definitely made decisions I wasn’t happy with, and rushed into things too quickly- I should have tempered my zeal with some cup vibes.
What I aspire to in the next twelve months: Big money, no whammies. 100%. (real transformation and staying the fuck away from any big problems and concerns) I’M SO HAPPY THIS CARD WAS REVERSED LET ME TELL YOU. The last time this mfer popped up in a yearly reading, I had gallbladder surgery.
What empowers me in reaching my aspirations: Breaking out of negative thoughts and anxiety, or maybe using those to my advantage whenever I can. Overcoming dark thoughts is something I need to continue to work on, even though I’ve come so far (ain’t that the truth).
What may stand in the way of reaching my aspirations: Time. Delays, Waiting. I might feel blocked, or stuck, but whatever it is will wait for me to figure my own shit out and get back to it. I hope these aren’t too delayed- I guess we’ll have to wait and find out.
My relationships and emotions in the coming year: Well, I don’t like the look of this. I’m going to take this card as a sign that I need to take control and prioritize my relationships and friendships whenever I can. I think I’ve already started on this path, so hopefully, it’ll continue.
My career, work and finances: I need to have discipline within myself- reign in the spending, be more mindful of my finances. The money might not come like it used to, it might be slowed down. I need to think about what is most important and how I can use work and finances to achieve this- for me, this is school stuff, so I need to prioritize spending instead of buying yet another seven tarot decks.
My health and well-being: Hope! Faith! Yes! I am hopeful that many of my longstanding health issues will be resolved this year, and I hopefully will be able to have more stability in my health and in my sense of self. I’ve been waiting almost 2 years to have a problem with my eye fixed, so this is an incredibly welcome relief.
My spiritual energy and inner fulfilment: Ooo interesting. Love, relationships, my cups will be filled maybe by myself or maybe (probably) by others- this is interesting with the card for 6- the wheel of fortune reversed… Hmm. Have to percolate on this one.
What I most need to focus on for the year ahead: PARTYING! Letting myself go, being free, getting together with the people who bring me love and joy. Oh, I like this card. I like this card very much.
What will be my most important lesson in the coming year: Learning how to lead others and to accept their accolades when I am successful- I think this is directly related to a job I’m looking forward to this summer. I’ll be in charge of a lot of folks, and this is new for me, but hopefully, this card speaks of success in this endeavour.
Overall, where am I headed in the next twelve months: I’m headed into the realm of choices (gd I’ve been getting a lot of this card lately????!!!) and hopefully I won’t end up like Plath’s fig tree, stuck in perpetual fear of choosing one of the options until they all rot away and expire.
Alright, folks- let me know what little rituals you have for your birthday in the comments!
Whoops! It was my birthday on Friday, and I spent it travelling to see a specialist in Halifax, so these got a bit delayed but here they are! I’m also going to try and do a yearly recap and plan for this coming year in the next couple of posts. But first!
Day 10: What can I do to cultivate a deeper appreciation for my current journey?
Card: Four of Cups
Meditation! I need to sit and percolate on how far I’ve come, and I need to be mindful of not turning away options and new choices that present themselves (as well as the ones I’ve already got in front of me now).
Day 11: What can I learn from the plants and the trees I find around me right now?
Card: The Fool Rx (reversed).
Uncertainty, taking too many risks and not knowing what’s going to happen in the future. Go slow, have faith that the safety net will be there when you need it.
Day 12: What is the significance of animals I am currently seeing or hearing?
Card: Justice Rx.
I need to take accountability for my own mistakes, take into account my own biases, and show both myself and the creatures around me some kindness.
Deck used: This Might Hurt.
What do you think of my readings? That last one really threw me for a loop… hmm. Let me know in the comments!
The prompt for day 9 is: How can the Universe help me manifest what I want to attract?
Card pulled: 2 of Swords.
It looks like the universe is going to give me some difficult options to choose from, and I’m going to have to figure out how to navigate that. This kind of reading piques my curiosity, so I’m going to pull a couple of oracle cards to clarify.
Clarifier cards: The Hind and The Horse.
The hind is a card of subtle and feminine expression, and the horse is a card of travel and exploration. The horse seems to be on the move, graceful and purposeful, while it seems like we’ve caught the hind unawares, in her own realm, tucked away in secret. Maybe these choices will be different in the way they present themselves- one obvious and showy, the other subtle and quiet. If that’s the case, I might miss the subtle and quiet one all together!
The tarot deck used for day 9 was the same as in my last post, This Might Hurt. It’s a rocking good deck.
The oracle deck I’ve used here is one I’ve had since I was like…10? Maybe? The cards are huge, and I struggle with the symbolism, but I bought it at like a Chapters because I was super into Celtic everything (I was trying to find myself through my ethnicity/ancestral background) and I liked animals- I still do! I figured I’d give it a bash and see how it goes. The cards themselves are stunning, but I find the imagery difficult to link and remember. It’s called The Druid Animal Oracle and mine came with a beautiful book and a reading cloth.
I did absolutely nothing all day yesterday and it was magical, although now it means a day of catch-up! So I present to you, the prompts from the last two days :).
Day 7: How can I use nature to cultivate a deeper sense of inner peace?
Cards drawn: 6 of Pentacles Rx, and Page of Swords Rx.
Surrounding myself with nature will help to replenish my empty tanks, and give myself the opportunity to be a bit ‘selfish’ and focus on self-care (6 of Pentacles Rx). In doing this, I can help to silence the constant uncertain questions that bounce around in my head, wondering if I’m making the right choices, or if I’m headed down the wrong path (Page of Swords Rx).
You know it’s a bit strange but we do seem to think of self-care as selfishness when we first get into it. Why should I be spending on myself, focusing only on myself when I should be giving to and thinking of others- and while a healthy sense of altruism is a good thing to have, you cannot give to others if you have nothing within you to give. The old saying ‘you can’t pour from an empty cup’ is true when it comes to taking care of yourself. There’s nothing wrong with making sure you’re meeting your own needs first.
Day 8: What inner strength can I draw on to empower myself?
Card pulled: 7 of Swords
I can use my ability to strategize to my advantage- or maybe I can steal a bunch of stuff? hahaha 🙂
The deck I’ve used here is one of my favourites, and I’m so happy I bought it- It’s called This Might Hurt and it’s one of the decks I personally have connected really well with. It seems really easy for me to read, most of the time, and I really like the way the creator has designed and linked the ideas through her own lens. It’s queer inspired and you’ll see a lot of female kings, and mix gender pages. There’s also representation for all sizes, shapes, skin tones and of different disabilities. I really like this deck, and if the indie printing price tag is too high for you or it’s not available where you are right now, you’re in luck! It’s been picked up for mass production and should be available this summer on amazon or other witchy metaphysical shops near you at a much lower sticker price.
So, what do you like to do for self-care? What cards did you pull? What do you think of my interpretation? Tell me in the comments!!
Day 5: How can I use, or embrace my natural environment to help me with my current journey?
Cards pulled: The Pathfinder (mirror card Page of Pentacles), The Phoenix (mirror card the Hierophant), 5 of Birds (mirror card 5 of Swords).
The pathfinder in this deck is the one who works hard to find his way through life and through his struggles and problems, and as such, I think is encouraging me to keep working hard at school and at work (the systems in my life may be referenced here with the Phoneix), but not to push myself past the point of no return (5 of swords). I have to remember to slow down and take it easy whenever I can.
The deck used here is the Cosma Vision Oracle from James R Eads. I think this particular deck is absolutely stunning, especially with the navy blue foiling around the edges. It can be a bit tricky for a novice to read because the suits are different, the court cards (King, Queen, Page and Knight) are their own suit with different names, and the major arcana has changed as well. That being said, the little guidebook is incredibly helpful, and if you have a basic understanding of RWS systems, this isn’t so hard to follow. It’s a *teeny weeny* bit expensive, but the website often runs sales, and if you keep an eye on it, you can snag it for a discounted price.
What cards did you pull? What do you think about decks with different major arcana representations? Tell me in the comments!
Tardy to the party for day 3 (sorry) I’m going to combine those mofos together.
And also? I am not very good at tarot photography it turns out. I am not bad at photography generally, but I am terribly out of practice. This is less than ideal. I know. I’m sorry. Hopefully my photos get better!
Today I’ll be using an oracle deck as well. Oracle decks aren’t the same as tarot decks- they have no set number of cards, or set imagery that they should cover. They mean whatever the creator wants them to mean (and usually they come with a little book to explain what they mean). They can be used on their own, with tarot decks and tarot spreads, or a mixture of both- there’s no wrong way to use oracle cards! Now! Onto the prompt:
Day 3: What part of me and I encouraged to show, express or share (more)?
Cards pulled: Strength reversed (Rx), The Empress, and 4 of wands Rx.
For me, this reading means I should be proud of my current physical transformations* because I’ve managed to stay the course and not falter on my goals. I’m beginning to feel tired, and I don’t really want to do it any more, and I think this reading wants me to be more self-confident and proud of what I’ve achieved, so I can continue!
The deck used here is The Modern Witch Tarot– one of my firsts and one of my favourites (and in my opinion: one of the few mass market decks with decent quality card stock for not a billion dollars but whatever). Highly recommend this deck: female-centred, traditional RWS-based deck for those on a budget.
Day 4: Where am I to use my instincts and follow my intuition? Why is this important for me?
Cards pulled: The Duck and Chrysanthemum (Luck), The Hare and the Oak (new opportunities), The Hound and Pear (loyalty).
Hmm… I keep getting cards about new opportunities lately- and choices, they seem to be following me and I’m really not sure why because I thought I knew everything on the go at the moment. I think this reading is telling me that I need to keep my eyes open and follow my instinct when it comes to new opportunities and lucky chances (maybe I should be buying lotto tickets, lol). Loyalty could be why this is important to me- maybe it’s telling me that I should follow my intuition when it comes to the new happenings in my life and that the loyal lovelies in my life will have my back, no matter what.
The deck used here is an oracle deck! Very popular at the moment, it’s Woodland Wardens– a series of animal and plant pairings and a cute little guide book to go with them.
What do you think? What cards did you pull today? Let me know in the comments!
Happy readings 💛💛
-Madame Starbeam
*I’ve been trying to lose weight, as I’m quite heavy, and it’s at the point where it’s bad for my health, bad for my back, bad for the longevity of my mattress, etc. I would like to be able to climb a flight of stairs and not feel winded, and I would like to feel comfortable flying economy- not like I’ve been crow-bared in and out of the seat. I’ve been at it since October, and I’ve lost just about 22lbs (the bigger thing is, I’ve stuck to my eating plan, something I’ve never been able to do before).
Day 2: What is ready to take shape or manifest for me?
Card drawn: 9 of Vessels (cups for this deck)
It’s starting to look like I might have a card that’s following me… choices, choices, choices. Opportunities are opening up for me (really? I’m not sure what they might be, to be honest with you…) and choices are there to manifest. Now just to choose the right one!
I’ve been reading a lot about making decisions and choices in some of the classes I’m taking at the moment. Did you know that there are theories for decision-making? If you’re the kind of person who sometimes feels stuck when it comes to making big decisions, I encourage you to check out some of the theories behind how people make decisions- question your motivations, the benefits of both, and exactly why you need to make the decision in the first place.
The deck used here is Ari Wisner’s Transient Light Tarot, which was sustainably created, and almost always gives me super positive vibes. It’s LGBTQIA+ friendly, with a lack of gender specificity, and a general feeling of inclusivity that I love.Check it out!
What card did you pull for today’s challenge? Let me know in the comments.
What I’m going to show you is an activity that takes place monthly on a really awesome Tarot Discord Server, that I would highly recommend tarot readers of all levels and ages check out. It’s a very warm and welcoming space, with tonnes of resources and people who at various stages and levels of tarot knowledge. It’s alphabet mafia friendly, and you have the opportunity to virtually interact with lots of cool folks. It’s called Tarotholics and can be found easily in the search for server function.
Once a month, a card is chosen and you’re encouraged to find different representations of that card in the decks you own, and compare the imagery. What this does (quite nicely) is show you, the reader, how the images vary from deck to deck and how that can impact the nuances you can find in the meaning of each card.
As the fool was the card discussed this week, I’ll show you my thoughts on some Fools of my own! But first, let’s look at the traditional RWS depiction and some more traditional meanings.
The Fool traditionally shows a young person, walking with a small animal (usually a dog) about to wander off a cliff, happily and heedlessly. Often it looks something like this:
Upright this card usually represents new beginnings, new journeys, a free-spirited person or the concept of being a free spirit, and taking risks. Reversed this card can represent being not ready to take a big step or a big leap of faith, taking too many needless and senseless risks (like walking off a cliff), or holding back from achieving a new beginning. (For more information, check out the link at the beginning of this description).
Here are a few different Fool cards from a few decks I own. I’ve also included some of my thoughts on the images of each and how they could theoretically impact a reading. I’d love to hear your thoughts on my interpretations and how The Fool in your deck(s) may be different from mine!
Walking Mediation Tarot: Freshly fallen snow, the silence of the woods in the middle of winter. There is a sense of new paths carved in the snow, but a warning not to act without thinking things through. No one wants to be alone in the woods in the winter- lost with no idea where you are or where the nearest warm safe space is. I can see innocence and the search for a new path. I would read this more as a stronger warning to look before beginning something new.
Tarot for All Ages: Strong RWS imagry here, but I like the new growing white rose wrapped around the staff of the fool to reinforce that sense of newness, first growth, uncertainity. I would read this one as more about heedless exploration- go and explore but be careful where you may end up!
Transient Light Tarot: A figure freefalling into space, with growth and perhaps beauty in the eye of the beholder. A key hangs just outside of your grasp, but it’s there for you- you can grab it if you find your way back on a safer path. I read this one as slower, less speed and less urgency. Things fall slowly in space, not like off a cliff. I can see nods to beauty (the flower in the eye) here. I think I read this one as more like the power is within you and you know it, but you can’t quite see it the way you should. There’s something blocking your logic, so be careful but you’ll get there in the end.
Now what about you? What does the Fool look like in your deck? I’d love to see it! Feel free to tell me about it in the comments!
Day 1: What am I guided to open myself up to, or explore, this month? How can this help me?
Cards drawn: 4 of Swords Reversed and 7 of cups Reversed.
Overwhelmed with choices and indecision (7 of cups Rx), I need to take a moment and take a break, recuperate and recharge my energy (4 of Swords Rx). Without taking this break, I will break down, causing my mind and health to rot. I need to stop and take a break.
Lucky timing with this one as well, because I’ve just finished an intensive 5-week course, and I have a few weeks off before I begin again!
The deck I’ve used is Hush Tarot, one I find particularly hard to read. It has the most beautiful, morbid illustrations but I really struggle to connect with it. I’m hoping that using it more often will help.
Hello lovely tarot community! This month, I’ll be taking part in the Lionharts’ WanderLust Tarot Challenge. I highly suggest you follow them on Instagram! They’re an amazing tarot resource.
Each day, I’ll try to upload a car or spread that fits for the prompt the day!
I’d love for you to follow along and ask questions or comment on my interpretations!
Madame Starbeam's Tarot Journey 